2 Nephi 33

Nephi gives a powerful closing testimony in this chapter. He speaks of the charity he has for all men and that he has hope for all as long as they reconcile themselves unto Christ and walk the narrow path that leads back to Him. He declares that his words will stand as a testimony against all that will not partake of the goodness of God and bids them an everlasting farewell. I love how he uses the description, "I speak unto you as the voice of one crying from the dust." It makes me think of how Nephi was a real person, just like I am. He was really here on the earth and had much of the same physical struggles and the same basic spiritual battle that I am now experiencing. He loved, he hurt, he bled, he sweat, he cried, he laughed, he felt the Spirit, and he felt grief over his own weaknesses. What an amazing experience when we realize that these men and women of the scriptures were men and women just like we are! It makes it all so much more personal somehow.

2 Nephi 32

This chapter contains the powerful verse about prayer. Nephi tells us that the Spirit teaches a man to pray and the devil teaches a man that he must not pray. I know there have been times in my life where I have felt unworthy to pray. I felt that I would be a hypocrite to approach the Lord in the unworthy state that I was in. Yet, through the dark, I would feel the gentle tuggings of the Spirit, knowing deep down that I needed to pray at that moment more than ever. Without fail, I would always find the comfort, the forgiveness, and the will to turn again unto the Lord as I prayed. Heavenly Father loves us unconditionally and He is always there, waiting for us to come to Him for help in our struggles and most especially in our weakest moments.

2 Nephi 31

Nephi teaches us about the Savior's atonement and His perfect example for us. He points out that, even in His perfection, Christ humbly submitted to the will of the Father and was baptized. A prideful person would have haughtily declared that he had no need of repentance or forgiveness because he was free from stain. Yet Christ did not protest. He willingly obeyed and thereby set forth the example for the rest of us to follow.

I need a large dose of humility sometimes. I try so hard to be obedient and to follow the Lord's commands with exactness. Because of my earnest struggle for perfection, however, I am sometimes easily offended at the suggestion that I could be doing more, or when my faults or weaknesses are pointed out by another. Christ had no regard for the opinion of man. He cared only about pleasing the Father. I must continue to seek for the approval of Heavenly Father and not worry about how the world sees me. The Lord knows my heart. He knows how hard I am trying. Unfortunately, he also sees even those weaknesses that I seek to hide the deepest. I am broken and utterly vulnerable before His all-knowing eye. Yet there is a profound comfort in knowing that He not only loves me in spite of all of my faults, He stands ready to help me in overcoming them and is ever willing to forgive me for them. He sees my eternal potential and divine nature and I am His child. Nothing could possibly give me more happiness or contentment than to feel His all-encompassing love.

Mosiah 4:27

And see that all these things are done in wisdom and order; for it is not requisite that a man should run faster than he has strength. And again, it is expedient that he should be diligent, that thereby he might win the prize; therefore, all things must be done in order.

I am feeling so totally worn out, mentally & physically. I'm in the thick of things with school right now. I have two papers due next week and two finals the week after that. I'm trying to put together a service project for each of the Foster and Ballantyne families for Christmas. I just recently got called as the 1st counselor in the Young Women's presidency. Christmas is looming large and I have only done a bare minimum of shopping. I feel exhausted all of the time because I'm not getting enough sleep or exercise or eating well. So today, I picked up the scriptures to find some words of comfort to help me keep going. This scripture came to mind and it is exactly what I needed to hear. All of these things that I am trying to balance in my life need to be done in wisdom and order. There is definitely an order of priorities and I just physically can't do it all. I just need to make sure that the things I do choose to spend my time on are the things that matter most. No, I can't just bag my papers because I know my children are more important. But I can make sure I don't spend an absurd amount of time on them. I will pray for the Lord's help in accomplishing the things that matter most and that He will give me the serenity to let go of the things that I just can't do.